Narrative essay paragraph one! Let me know what you think

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Narrative essay paragraph one! Let me know what you think

Post  ChenelleM on Thu Oct 14, 2010 10:49 pm

Nancy had finally figured out how to commute home after work in less than an hour. Her husband Ronald would have been proud; the commute use to take them so long. That night she lit a candle as she called him and once again she left a message. Nancy and Ronald Johnson had been married for five years, she worked as a nurse for the local hospital, and Ronald an architect had recently begun his own firm. All their friends where envious of their relationship, the two of them seemed to have gotten marriage right. The phone rang it was Ronald.
“Hi Nancy, I have some bad news...” said Ronald
“Don’t tell me, you not coming home tonight?” Nancy interrupted.
“I have some clients coming in the morning; I think it best if I stay in town.” Ronald said “Are you still there?” He continued.
“I’m here, at home, alone, as usual!” She lashed out.
He tried to explain but Nancy was fed up with his endless excuses, there was a dead silence. Nancy understood that starting his business would be hard, but she had no idea that it would mean being separated for days at a time. She had tried being the supportive wife, but could no longer lie to herself or to him. That was the first time she had ever hung up the phone on Ronald. She opened up the bottle of red wine his mother had given them for their first anniversary, and toasted to herself as she blew out the candle. Nancy ate in bed that night, the microwave dinners no longer tasted bad.


Last edited by ChenelleM on Thu Oct 21, 2010 5:44 pm; edited 1 time in total

ChenelleM

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Re: Narrative essay paragraph one! Let me know what you think

Post  Vianela on Wed Oct 20, 2010 11:17 am

Good job Chenelle, Im looking forward to reading the rest of your story, sounds very interesting and sad, Nancy sounds like a very lonely person or is she???????????

A++++++

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Re: Narrative essay paragraph one! Let me know what you think

Post  smarquez on Wed Oct 20, 2010 9:26 pm

definitely would like to hear more... Great start!!! Very Happy

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