My Proposal & Feedback

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My Proposal & Feedback

Post  juliesymons on Mon Oct 11, 2010 5:42 pm

(Title not yet decided)


The bells rings and everyone is frantically dispersing out into the halls. It is Friday afternoon and everyone is as ready as ever to get out of class. As soon as I reach the main corridor of my school I realize something is different, very different. People, in the halls are staring. My first initial thought was that, like many other countless times in my years at high school, people were gazing at my posse of girls. We are in fact the schools cheer squad and are used to the occasional glare from our fellow classmates, but this time, it was almost as if they weren’t staring as much at us as a whole, but directly at me. It wasn’t until I reached my destination, my assigned locker and looked into my mirror that I realized exactly what it was everyone else was seeing. I was losing my hair. Chunks, clumps, millions of tiny strands of it were scattered all along my shoulder and sleeves of my new white sweater. I knew the chemo was going to make me have hair loss, but I defiantly did not expect it to happen this fast and this drastic. Only my family and closest friends knew, but at this rate there was no chance in hiding it. I was going to lose all of my hair whether I liked it or not. I promised myself to not let it get to me, and to make sure that no matter what I would not fret over a little temporary hair loss, but this, this was not what I was ready for.

My narrative essay is about a normal teenage girl, 17 years of age, attending high school in Toronto, Ontario. She is very involved with school. Head of the cheerleading squad and captain of the debate team are only a few off the many clubs she is working with. Not long after her senior year of high school has begun, she finds out she is suffering from breast cancer. Along with attending chemo therapy, juggling school, friends and family she has decided to make a list, a list of everything she wants to do before she dies. It is up to her and the help of anyone else who wishes to make sure that list is finished as soon as possible.

I have not yet decided if in the end the main character will pass away or not, hence why I did not mention it in my synopsis.


FEEDBACK:
- Be careful not to put in too much detail because it is only a 1000 word essay.
- This essay will probably end up being a 7 paragraph long essay.
- Try and not make the main characters list too long. Just make the list a couple of things and that way a paragraph of each would be enough.

juliesymons

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